American Pie
*** BM
Starring: Jason Biggs, Chris Klein, Mena Suvari, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Allyson Hannigan, Tara Reid, Seann William Scott, Eddie Kaye Thomas

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I managed to see an early preview of this film, in which they stupidly SHOWED the big 'talked-about' scene where Jason Biggs dips his wick in the pie. Since that was the major shock payoff... I have to say I was somewhat disappointed in this film.

The plus side here is that we have some reasonably good pot-shots at how stupid teenagers can be (MILF), a character named Shitbreak, a character named Stifler's Mom, Shitbreak slamming Stifler's Mom on a pool table, and a band chick smackin' her bitch up. The downside is that we have most of the big punchy jokes revealed in the commercials, the ridiculous story of some hot exchange student masturbating in the room of a dork, and the dumb guy from "Election" basically playing Ted "Theodore" Logan again and somehow managing to have LESS appeal than Keanu Reeves (a feat I never thought possible, although, to be fair, the Bill & Ted movies ARE the only ones that feature Keanu actually sporting a facial expression).

Is it legal for high school chicks to wear these tight shirts that are basically nothing but cleavage? In my high school... which I left only a few short years ago... anything remotely revealing was pretty much frowned upon (although, inexplicably, skimpy cheerleading skirts were allowed). Have the styles changed that much, have rules relaxed... or is it just a Hollywood 'suspension of disbelief' that we're to believe that high school girls, generally self-conscious about their bodies, would flaunt everything daily? I believe this high school is supposed to be in Michigan, which ain't far from where I was... somebody enlighten me here.

I do have to give the flick points for going as far as it did, and I'm sure I would have laughed a lot more of it if I hadn't SEEN it all before they released it. As The Onion states, I'm sure twelve more pastry-coitus movies are on their way from all the other major studios, since there's no original concept in Hollywood that can't be completely beaten into the ground and made worthless in about a year's time.

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